Case Study: Monifieth Befrienders

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Established in 2000, Monifieth Befrienders match volunteer befrienders with older isolated people. They run a range of befriending services including one to one befriending, social lunches, a ​Men’s Brunch Group, a knitting group and more.

Their case study demonstrates how volunteering your time with a befriending project can make a real difference in people’s lives.

I feel healed inside

Dennis is 54 and heard about volunteering as a befriender through a friend and thought it would be an honourable thing to do. Dennis has been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome (PTSD) and speaks freely about his condition. He receives support from various organisations for his own problems and experienced how helpful this could be. He was aware he could transfer communication skills from his time in past occupations and he missed socialising as he lived alone. He is supported by a close-knit family. In his own words, “I took the bull by the horns and contacted Monifieth Befrienders”.

Dennis was matched with Geoff, who is 72 years old and living with dementia. They have been matched for over a year and during that time, Dennis’ feelings of protecting himself, guarding, and holding back have all diminished.

“I have been well matched with Geoff. My self-worth has increased and my self-esteem is high since I have been befriending Geoff. I now feel confident and healed inside.”

A two-way conversation

Each week Dennis visits Geoff at home and they chat with Geoff’s wife Mary, then Dennis and Geoff go out for coffee and cake or a walk. Dennis has learned a lot about Geoff including that he and Mary were childhood sweethearts and he worked offshore. He likes football and was a goalkeeper when young and he has a sense of pride when telling this to Dennis.

Geoff will ask Dennis questions and although there are times of silence Dennis explains it is a “happy silence” but the two-way conversation is stimulating for them both. At times the conversation can be repetitive but Dennis is patient and gives Geoff thinking time. Both Dennis and Geoff look forward to their time together each week.

Making a difference for the family

Geoff’s wife Mary is grateful to Monifieth Befrienders:

“Geoff is more relaxed after being with Dennis, he has a smile on his face and he is wanting to tell me what they have done together… Geoff is disappointed if illness or another appointment interferes with the weekly meetings”

Thankfully this doesn’t happen often and if it does, they try to meet up on a different day.

Mary made Dennis feel at home and introduced him to their son and granddaughters. Geoff’s son said to Dennis, “Thank you so much for what you are doing for my Dad”.

A year ago, Mary seemed to do everything for Geoff, like zipping up his jacket, but now Geoff is coping and becoming more independent. When Geoff says, “I cannot do this”, Dennis says, “Try it.”

Dennis feels he is privileged to be part of Monifieth Befrienders. He says,

“I look forward to our time together – mark it on my calendar. This is not about me; the focus is on my Friend.”

Get involved

If you’ve been inspired by Dennis’s story of volunteering with Monifieth Befrienders, reach out to them to start your befriending journey. Visit their directory listing to learn more about their project and how to get involved.

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