“I get as much out of our friendship as Kevin does.” / The Befriending Scheme
7th November 2025
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The Befriending Scheme provides friendship and learning opportunities for vulnerable people over 16 years old across Suffolk, including those with learning disabilities, mental health needs, and other isolated groups.
In their case study, they share the story of Kevin and Barry, and how their befriending match has grown into a mutual friendship.
Kevin and Barry are linked through The Befriending Scheme’s 1:1 befriending service and have been friends for 8 years. Their friendship has grown and developed into a very strong, safe and respectful bond, which also extends to Kevin’s mum, who he lives with.
Barry said,
“I get as much out of our friendship as Kevin does.”
It was clear to Barry at their initial meetings and chats that Kevin had not had the opportunity to enjoy many activities, experiences or “normal things” outside of his home life, so they discussed what Kevin would like to do. They have enjoyed so much variety within their friendship, from Kevin’s first “posh” coffee and cake, meals out, visits to the seaside, cinema trips, Jimmy’s Farm, shopping, walks and garden centres. Kevin also enjoyed his first train ride with Barry.
All their memories are recorded in their friendship diary, which Kevin keeps. Barry writes the first sentence after their day together and Kevin independently writes after Barry has left. Kevin’s diary entries over the years have become longer and far more expressive. He has noted “first train ride”, “going out new places”, “having a friend”. They always write on Kevin’s home calendar when their next day with each other will be.
Barry has stated that Kevin has come such a long way and is far more capable than he is given credit for. When out together Kevin now orders his own food, drink and pays himself, instead of waiting for help or reassurance, which is confidence-building. They are well known in local coffee shops and eateries; Barry has observed how Kevin has more trust in his own capabilities. Barry has always made a conscious effort to allow Kevin to express himself. They have navigated the pandemic, health issues and all types of situations that friends encounter during time together.
Barry has said that he “loves being out with Kevin and it is a very easy 2-way friendship.” Kevin has helped Barry to enjoy his retirement and life more; as Kevin approaches life in a slower manner. Barry has also noticed that he too appreciates the everyday things more.
Barry explained that he initially hoped to volunteer because he enjoys motivating people to increase independence. However, over the years, they have built a genuine and caring friendship which has extended into far more than they both had anticipated.
This case study is part of Befriending Week (1 – 7 November), the annual campaign to raise awareness about befriending and celebrate social connection. Find out more on our Befriending Week microsite.